Dear Alexis,
How is possible that 8 years have gone by since the day you were born? It seems like it was just yesterday that I was writing the missive for your 6th and 7th birthdays! Time passes so quickly and seems to more so now that you are in my life.
Eight years ago today you blazed in to my world and it changed me forever. Before you have children people will tell you how much it will change not only your life, but you as well. I knew things would change, but I didn't understand the extent to which that was true. Before you were born I knew love, but I don't think I even came close to understanding what love actually was. Once you arrived I had no doubt that I completely grasped what it was to love someone. Parents always say that their kids have changed them, but you truly have changed me and I think for the better.
As trite as it might sound you are my sunshine, just like the song I sing to you so often before you go to bed. I see the entire world through your eyes and things that I have long since gotten over the wonder of look brand new through you. You bring the shine back to the simplest of things, a flower, a butterfly, a book, a song. I love looking at things through you. You completely change my ideas on a regular basis. You challenge me in the best ways, even on days where I am over your drama and just want to sell you to the circus! Even on those days you can still amaze me in big ways. I love that about you.
I loved seeing New York at Christmas through your eyes. I can't wait to see a Broadway show through your eyes this fall. I loved that we had been on the streets of New York for less than 10 minutes and you turned to me and said, "Mom I so want to move here!" You see life as an adventure and life really should be just that. I've loved watching you learn and grow. Everyday you learn something new and many days you teach me a thing or two as well. I like that about you.
I've mentioned before how caring you are, but it still amazes me how much this grows with you. You are my little empath. You feel in ways that astound me, in a good way. If someone is happy, you are happy with them. You reflect their joy. If someone is sad, you'll cry with them and do anything you can think of to make them feel better. You are the most caring person I've ever known. This is another thing I love about you.
I worry sometimes that you are too empathetic and the big bad world is going to come in an squash you like a little bug. My heart broke for you at Papaw's funeral. You were devastated, partly because you were and partly because you were feeding off of the sad energy in the room. As I held you close and told you everything was going to be ok, you got this look on your face like you knew it was true. It wasn't until after the funeral that you stopped crying, but you realized that life hands you things you might not like, but you have to muddle through. You always pull yourself up. I love that about you.
I've told you before, but I still hope that all your dreams come true. You have such big ideas about the world and how it should be. You want to make things better. I really like that about you. I hope that you never lose that wide eyed wonder of the world. I hope you go and see and do. Don't end up regretting the things you never did. Do them! You'll regret what you didn't do much more than the things you did even if they don't turn out the way you might have hoped. One thing that will never change is that you can learn something from any situation, whether it be good or bad. The important part is to learn and move on to the next adventure. Trust me, there will always be another adventure, all you have to do is hope, dream, look and find. Enjoy life! You only get one.
The most important thing to remember is that I always love you. I am your biggest fan and your most ardent supporter. I will always be there to listen, to hold you when you cry, to help you understand the things that might seem completely incomprehensible, to help when you need a hand. I'm so glad that you came in to my life. I'm so glad that you are you. Never change to suit someone else. It's essential to be yourself. If you have to change to have a friend then they aren't worth having and aren't a true friend to begin with. You are amazing just as you are.
Love,
Mom
